Leaving uni suddenly

Never have I felt so united with so many people globally. We are all sharing this strange experience that can only be describes as almost dreamlike, or maybe nightmare. However, even though we are all experiencing the effects of the one same thing, our experiences are so unique and personal. I am so unbelievably lucky with my situation, I have a lovely family, a nice safe home in an area near countryside, no elderly relatives, and no key workers in my family. I think that because of this I have been able to reflect, which is the one word I would use to sum up my experience. I am also very aware of mental health and the issues potentially triggered by this situation, which I thought might be helpful to remember. In summary I thought I could start recording some of my thoughts and feelings to look back on, as a reminder of how to stay positive, how to be grateful, and just generally remembering this strange time.

Leaving Uni

It still feels like a film, something apocalyptic about it all and overall panicking. At first, I thought like most things the corona news was exaggerated and largely fake, fuelled by social media and fear mongering. Being at university at the time when this all began; I feel mad the experience very different to the rest of the countries.

I’m not sure if it was a mixture of the university and the government trying not to cause mass panic, or if it was the untouchable mindset of the university age group, but the seriousness of the virus, let alone the idea of a pandemic was not even considered until much later than everywhere else, or so it seemed.

It was probably a dangerous mixture of those two factors, and the UK being notoriously relaxed about the situation, something they have now seen was wrong. Being surrounded by thousands of people that were not in the ‘at risk’ category, the admittedly stupid notion of being invisible when your young, and the general feel that our immediate lives where still moving along as normal, I feel made us turn a blind eye to the crisis .I’m upset to say this, as I was so shocked by all the deaths and the fast spread of the virus, however being completely immersed in an environment like university, especially in the UK, definitely made us some of the last to take the virus seriously, and gave us the feeling that the virus was far away.

This unique naive bubble that we were all in contributed to how quickly the whole situation escalated for us. Its bizarre to think about but everything changed daily, and within a week everything we knew as normal was gone. From one day where it seemed that all holidays, uni ski trips and even year abroad where cancelled, everything suddenly felt as though it had changed overnight.

There where rumours of other universities closing, but we were continuing to attend uni with our tutors giving off fairly relaxed vibes. Over a weekend the tone of the university completely changed, and it was announced that it was closed. Confusion and panic from all students was so clear but we still thought maybe this just meant until after Easter.

There were a few days more of pure confusion, the messages were mixed from all sources. We seemed to become corona experts within days, and everyone must have thought they had a symptom at some point. Eventually we learnt about what it was we where actually looking for, and how long self-isolation was for, and how to do this.

Once we were advised to go home, and parents started to get involved, that was when it all became clear. The seriousness of the situation, the fact that we needed to pack up our lives and go back home, the fact that our second year was probably over and we wouldn’t see our friends for potentially months, that summer and even further future plans were cancelled, that family and friends could even loose lives and so much more. Safe to say it was a bomb shell to our normal uni lifestyle just the previous week.

There didn’t feel like there was much time to process any kind of emotion as it all happened so fast. I was aware however, that such a major change and loss of routine and lifestyle would affect me and everyone in a way, but maybe it. would take a while to sink in.

So I packed all my stuff within a matter of hours of my dad telling me it was time to come home, after two days of not being sure whether I should stay at uni or not (very glad I didn’t btw), and a speedy goodbye to friends, and that was it, second year over just like that.

The one thing that has constantly been a comfort and brought perspective throughout this whole situation has been seeing how much more difficult this has been for others and how lucky I am, but also the fact that we are all in the same boat. This attitude was with me in that crazy week when uni ended and is still so prevalent in my mind today.